ive been doing some thinking.. and ive come to the conclusion that most people in this world lack the common sense and basic understanding that is needed to function and live in this society.. althought it does sicken me to know how many important people in this " society " do lack what is needed ( or should i say was needed ) to function.

what i mean by that is.. society only changes with the majority of the generations.. right now i would have to say that the elderly rule the world. basically, anyone over the ripe old age of, oh lets say.. 55.. have no real say unless their parents hold with them some key and or link of great importance in the current or just past society.

anyway.. thats what i have been thinking about as of late..

and scott.. i apologize for my absense from this great vent we call freak ship. but my life is in transition.. things change.. others things are lost or left behind.


the sad thing about me no longer having ties or childhood strongholds in the place we, as of late, called home.. Flushing... is that i will only miss a certain few... i will not bore you with details or names, because dont forget, this is flushing and people love to have reasons to spread dirt on people or exhange dialoge such as " Mike said so-and-so will be one of the few that he will truely miss. " but its true.. i will only miss a few faces and memories of the others will be kept with me til the grave. im not saying that i will charish each and every insignificant memory about people that had no real important grip on me, but more like.. i will remember them, for those are the memories that have made me the person that i am.. and will shape the person that i will be for the years to come..

maybe im just rambling..

eeYAAaRRR

Mood... just got back from seeing pirates of the carribean for the second time. Thanks Clio

Signing out..


This is Ground Control to Major Tom
Please Respond Major Tom...

Damn...mike never posts anything new.. i mean c'mon mike.. Me and the Captain make it happen! Lately, minus the captain though.

Anyways, im eating cantelope right now. Yum. And im still wearing my work clothes from tonight so i smell like all sorts of food. So between the cantelope (which is very delicious i can assure you) and the smell of my clothes...im assuming i have a very hearty dinner!

It just crossed my mind that i should inform you of my day. I slept till 11am, studied some crap for my recruiters, went to work from 5-10:30, watched the part in Young guns where they trip on peyote, picked up my guitar at decaire's house, and am now where i sit, eating cantelope and writing on Freakship!

Bet that makes you wanna hang out with me eh? Anyways, back to the cantelope. It's pretty good. Ripened just enough, good texture, and sweet too. I say this is the best damn cantelope i have ever eaten! And trust me, i have eaten alot of cantelope in my day. Which reminds of the story once when i fell off my bike and got all scraped up..............

This one time i was riding my new bike that i got for christmas. It was like 25 degrees outside and i was in 3rd grade. I got one of dem new stunt bikes. More or less a BMX bike, but i called it a stunt bike back then. Maybe because i used to do crazy stunts with it which is where this story is going.....
Anyways, my old neighborhood was like one big steep hill, and at the bottom of the hill was where my house was, only my driveway went the opposite angle of the road so it went back up. Well, i was good at riding with no hands so i decided to go from the top of my neighborhood (about 5 blocks all together) all the way down to my house and up the drive way. So anyways, im going through the neighborhood and slowly gaining speed...ALOT of speed and i get to my driveway and shoot about halfway up it when i hit a huge patch of acorns since we had maple trees next to the drive way. My front tire shoots sideways to some retarded angle and i flip over the handle bars and skid up my drive way till i stoppped. Needless to say, i was very stupid and very hurt and never tried that crazy shit again.

((Sighs))

music: I Wanna Rock 'Twisted Sister'

Ok..sorry to write to much in one night...some ppl get lazy and only read the post at the top..but be assured there is great fun underneath this post.

Anyways, i just checked my horoscope that i get emailed to me every day. I signed up for it in like 96 and the fucking website keeps sending to me. I woulda thought they wouldn't went bankrupt, or gotten bored after a million years but they still send it. Out of pity i checked it. Here's what it said>>>

"You bail someone out of a dumb mistake
by making him or her look like a hero.
Most people will recognize you as the
real mastermind. Romance gets a boost
from an unexpected source. "

Now what the hell does that mean anyways? If anyone can decipher, feel free to im me (Fultonst1)

Damn... Heaven forbid that everytime i have some great masterpiece written the internet has no will to respond. Thus loosing every great word of advice i had to write!!! A new beginning, i think yes, i must write something else to fill the emptyness before me.

Blank...As i stare into oblivian. My mind raced all night after the the threats bestowed upon my life. Not threats of death, or bodily harm, but threats of war from tyranny, from a dictator far worse than the world has seen. I speak of the everlasting parental figure i call.... MY MOM!!!

I was made aware tonight that i could be spending the last few times at my house. This for the most part, doesn't really bother me. As some young waitress said at work " Oh My God, you have to find your own apartment, and pay your own bills, and be forced to grow up" I took this to heart cause its all so true. It is time to move away from the people who have taken care of me. I have accomplished everything society has told me to accomplish by this day and age. I got my driver's liscense, i got a job, im not a virgin, and i completed high school. Its time to finish growing up. Its time to get out on my own! With this all in mind i was inspired to write a song>>>


I fed the dog, and mowed the lawn
But your evil still did spawn
I washed the dishes and cleaned my room
and you still decided to deal out your doom

So mom i think its time
For me to speak my mind

Mom, I don't wear diapers anymore
Why did you cheat on dad you stupid whore
My time with you has been such a bore
its time for WAR...

My life was filled with lies
When it came to love you never tried
And even though im almost gone
you havent tried to bond

So mom i think its time
For me to speak my mind

Mom, I don't wear diapers anymore
Why did you cheat on dad you stupid whore
My time with you has been such a bore
its time for WAR...

!@#$!@$! you like that.....? #$%#!$%^ there, how about that? what thats not good enough? Well how bout some of this !@#!@#************************ yeah i bet you are questioning why you were talking jabba...


But it isnt gonna stop here........ !#!@#@#@#!@ i can do that all night and never get tired of it......

You bastard...... Thinking you can always get away with this. But now, some one has turned the tables and WAM!

you get a little bit of %^&(&*(^$!$$!$!%&%^*(&(IE%&*%&^%&@%^%& THAT IN YOUR FACE!

Junkopalinoheartydairymealforyourstomachthatyoucanthandlecauseyourlactoseintolerantfoooooooo!!!

all i have to say is... lol. great points dr.
i may not post as much, but it doesnt mean i dont care about the chicken sandwich in your hand. because i do. and i can prove it to you. all in due time.

im at a high point in my life at the moment.. lots of money, good friends, people i can relate to, and last but not least, almost total freedom to do whatever the fuck i please.

althought most of my life is a blur to me, i still look back and smile. ive had a fucked up family. ive had a fucked up life.. but who hasnt...
the only thing keeping me going is a brighter tomorrow and a girl. ( awww.... i dont want to hear it ) i speak the truth and if you dont understand that or would like express your confusion with dialog.. feel free to step in line to eat my ass.. cracka!

nuff..

Mood: unknown

Well Hello There!!! Apparently if your reading this, you are on your way to enjoying what the creative individuals here at Freakship have to say, or you are checking it out for the first time. Let me explain something that some individuals have yet to understand, considering the emails and comments i have gotten.

Freakship is kind of our way to express the necessary evils within our heads. We enjoy writing what we think about to share our personality with each and every adventageous reader. Here are some things to take into account while reading.......

1) These are our thoughts, not yours, so don't try to steal them.

2) Things written are sometimes at our breaking points of insanity or creativity. Or maybe we are in a bad mood. So don't judge us upon one entry. And if you have questions or comments... Email me at (Fultonst1@aol.com) or the Captain with the contact button located at the top of the screen. Be assured, we do like to hear what you have to say.

3) Nothing is to be taken personal in this text. Yes we do get out of hand sometimes, but only because we don't hold back from the flow, we just let it come and try to write it as fast as we can. We only do this so we don't screw you guys out of what we truly want to say as human beings.

4) We are not always right, nor are we trying to make thing the same way as us. We merely enjoy writing our interpretations of life as we see it in all aspects.

5) Last but not least, keep reading, cause eventually we will write something that is mind provoking even to you!

Don't hate us because we are honest, hate us because we don't shower and smell bad, and eat all your food when we come to your house.

Mood music: "Us and Them" Pink Floyd

I love Mountain Dew!!! Its my morning drink, and i think i am getting addicted to it. Sweet Sweet Addiction!! A love interest in carbonated water and flavored syrup.

I have arised at an early hour this morning. Early for me me is noon. I got to see the sun directly above my head this morning when i went out back to play with my dog. Normally the sun is at the evening sky's mid drift spot showing the bare part the violet and orange back drop behind the sun's last warming light of the day.

The nightlife is pure exctasy for me. I night of pure oppertunity to do what i want. And rest assured i love my day as much as night. But the nightlife just has more to offer most of the time. Yeah there is always something to do during the day, but it seems as though everything you do during the day has the ultimate purpose of prepping for the night. The night is where you reflect on how busy your day was and sit down to relax, and talk to friends who have gathered at the nearest empty house. So i say screw the day sometimes. Sleep all day so you can enjoy the prime relaxation time.

I just noticed something that makes me angry. The simplest most restarded thing in the world. The Buddy info on AIM. What the hell, ppl put such pointless shit in there. Write something that has purpose, some sort of adive and wisdom you hold that you can share with the world. Not pointless crap like > Favorite song: I have nothing creative to write in here< or > I love my girlfriend< yes these maybe sweet to yourself or to your girlfriend..but what about all the other individuals who look at your info to see some wisdom so they can better understand who you are.

All im saying is please, please, and im begging you! Write something worth reading, because im really pissed that i got up this early and all i can do to waste time is read shit in profiles like some qoute from Blink182, or everyone putting in there profile that they love their girlfriend (by the way very un-original and not sweet since EVERYONE DOES IT) and last but not least....the fucking stupid hyperlinks to a page that shows who looked at your website. God almighty i hope you people are proud of that cause no one else is...everyone clicks it and gets to that page and then damns whoever put it in their profile to hell. Not only cause we dont care who reads your profile, but you turn out to waste the5 seconds that we wont get back now.

SO PLEASE DONT BE SO UNORIGINAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <<

ok...I just woke up, its about 4pm. But really i just wanna jot down my dream i had. It will make no sense to you cause its just in pieces.

Vacationing with some friends guys i know and some girls i dont know. the only girl i knew was Nida
(knee-duh) She's a re-occurring dream character lately.

We are at some hotel and we all interact with eachother in the city, and the hotel rooms before we would go to bed each night. The town seemed to resemble vegas, minus the gambling.

I remember there being another place we visited with the whole group for a few nights. It was almost like some big house on a huge lake. We had a boat to use. Like a big huge as boat we had a prom. Boat got messed up so we had a little raft we were messing around on. Got popped and me and few ppl had to swim through some swamp like area. Weird thing is i can remember in detail like how it smelled, and i put on goggles and went under and can remember what i saw.

Anyways, vacation is coming to an end, and i know i will never see these girls again. I realized i havent even really made an attempt to talk to them this whole time. even though i wanted to. So i see Nida and this other girl downstairs on a couch and rush down there to talk. I sit there and realize they are kinda fondling eachothers bodies and just kinda moaning. And honestly this isnt a perveted thing, its not like some sick porno shit. Its like two girls knowing how to please the other. It was almost an art form of some sort. And you know they slowly stripped down in front of me, and moving closer. Never asked me to join but the invitation was there with no words. So there was a quote at this point, some sort of wisdom never said or thought...just there in the dream... "The pure essence of sex, cannot be controlled"

Now dont think this is some perverted mess. Cause its not. Its just some symbol in a dream. the dream was alot more than the two girls at the end, its just that was the last thing that happened before i woke up, so its harder to go back and review other parts for what they meant. Everyone has dreams every night that go ignored. I have been trying to decipher mine lately. Only cause the times that i do this i always understand my life a bit more.

I enjoy my sleep cause my dreams are getting much more detailed. Im starting to get more and more of a sense when im in a dream, but i always seem to wake up when i do. Definately more dream shit to come.

Feel free to email comments about Dr. Gonzo's posts anytime at: (Fultonst1@aol.com)

Well,
It has been awhile since my last confession.....
My summer has been a blur of sleeping threw the majority of the day and partying till the sun comes up, sometimes just hanging out till the sun comes up. It seems as though i have already began to lose touch with so many individuals who were my comorades during the last 6 or seven years of school. At the time of our last gathering in the hell hole we all once visited 6 hours a day i felt as though the transition of our lives into the future would be a bad thing. As of now the feelings have been numbed away with my own goals and satisfaction i take being alone.

Taking the last couple monthes to myself has been my time of rehabilitation and re-visitation to who i actually was. The true essence of my individuality was taken away by the standards and expectations of the small cultish society of flushing senior high. The only thing i gained was the sense of losing life's true purpose which is the freedom to do what we choose.

Now that i know from here on out the places i visit and the people i meet and the torturing of my spirits will be self enflicted. Thats what gives me the integrity to wake up, knowing that im in control, and the day is mine to choose. I say fuck the expectations of your peers and your elders, you are only what you create, and if you aren't the one sculping your individuality then your gonna be another pin prick in the voodoo doll named society that the goverment likes to play with. Living a dull and boring life doing infomercials at 3am, pretending that some one actually gives a shit about you or what your trying to sell.

Unfortunately, i realized the other night when this was all in persepective that i know the guys and girls who will be the ones doing these infomercials. These are the kids who always wanted to fit in, the ones who strived so hard to impress people they aren't gonna see ever again. They never understood that they only need to do is impress themselves, and thats the truth. There are leaders, and there are followers. If you don't know which one you are, it prolly means your a follower.

Don't live your life thinking about what you once had, or lost. Consider what you do have and be thankful for it.

I heard a great explanation of the wizard of oz once. Everyone remembers the famous line from the movie "There's no place like home", but yet if you think about the movie it is almost a contradiction to the story. At home its black and white, and some lady is trying to kill your dog, But oz was this great technocolor dream world full of surprises. You made great friends along the way with people you never even met................. So don't be afraid of living your life how you want to, don't hold back cause your leaving everything you once knew. Be true to yourself, and then let your life fall into place.

I think i have rambled on enough for now. To much wisdom at one time might overwhelm your pea shaped brains. I wouldnt want that pea to crumble under the pressure so i'll leave with something very simple that will impress any young adult who hasn't used their brain all summer like myself.>>>>

You can put a pool ball in your mouth, but you can't get it back out.

Mood music: 'Coldplay' "Everythings Not Lost"